A Jump: Part One
The Preamble
As many of you know, we are now less than a week away from Skydive Sunday—when my darling boy Evan is going to jump out of an airplane over the fields of Fife and freefall towards earth until the skydiving instructor safely guides him into a gentle glide for a safe landing.
Do I sound like a nervous mom?
Writer Anne Lamott says in Grace (Eventually), “You realize this at some point about your child—even when your kid is sixteen, you can see all ages in him, the baby wrapped up like a burrito, the one-year-old about to walk, the four-year-old napping, the ten-year-old on a trampoline.” My baby is now a young man. When I look at him, my maternal vision sees the chubby toddler and gawky teenager and the university student somehow all at once. How can this little boy who loves his stuffed shark be allowed to jump out of an airplane?
Evan is jumping out an airplane to raise funds for Make 2nds Count, a UK charity focused on secondary/metastatic breast cancer. They have a three-fold mission:
Research: In just five years, they have funded almost £650,000 in metastatic breast cancer research, including a project in Edinburgh to study the behavior of proteins in the process of metastasis and a project in Liverpool to evaluate an appropriate screening protocol for brain metastases.
Why it makes a difference: Research devoted to metastatic breast cancer has typically been only a tiny fraction of overall breast cancer research, by some estimates less than 10%. These projects will help inform the development of possible new treatments and the delivery of surveillance care for existing patients.
Education: In addition to other education and awareness projects, they maintain an updated, searchable list of clinical trials in the UK. They also support three senior research nurses who are available for free, personalized consultations with any patient in the UK to explain clinical trials and search for any trials available for that patient.
Why it makes a difference: Clinical trials can provide opportunities to access treatment that might give a patient more quality time, especially when other treatment lines have failed. My friend Lesley is an example—in less than two years, all the available treatment lines for her had failed. She was told to get her affairs in order and expect the end within months. And then she got the last open spot in a clinical trial for a new treatment—and seven years later, she’s still here.
Support: Make 2nds Count provides online and in-person patient groups and retreats along with a host of information sessions and resources targeted for secondary breast cancer patients.
Why it makes a difference: It can be tremendously encouraging to talk to other patients who understand the unending nature of treatment and the challenges of living with an incurable diagnosis. Practical sessions on exercise with metastases and resources like travel insurance focused on cancer patients make a difference for daily life. I’ve greatly appreciated the range of support offered by this community and charity.
I’m so delighted and moved that Evan has chosen to use his skydive as an opportunity to make a difference through Make 2nds Count.
Do I sound like a proud mom?
The truth is that the worst part of this diagnosis—far worse than physical pain, uncertainty about treatment and scans, or daily life redefined by new limitations—is having to place this burden on the people you love most in the world. The truth is that those first days after the diagnosis are still tender to the touch of memory—less raw now, but not yet encased in a callus or prodded without care. The truth is that I used to lie awake in the hospital bed we had to install in Dave’s study and pray that God would not put my boys through this. The truth is that I hate even remembering those moments and those fears.
And now the hospital bed is gone. I can climb the stairs again. We have not fallen apart. My prayers for my boys continue, but the fears have receded. We’ve had the gift of more time, and that time has been good. I love seeing these boys grow into men, seeing them grow in knowledge and wisdom, exploring opportunities for study and relationships and travel and fun and service and adventure—like jumping out of an airplane to skydive to raise money for a charity that means a great deal to me. I’ll be there. I’ll be there on the ground, thrilled for so many reasons to see my boy, this young man, my heart, tethered to a parachute.
Do I sound like an excited mom?
I am nervous, and proud, and excited, and so grateful.
There’s still time if you’d like to contribute to Evan’s fundraiser! Here is the link. And thank you so much for every donation and every note of encouragement!
You Might As Well Jump
What better song before jumping out of an airplane for a charity skydive than “Jump” by Van Halen? Enjoy this clip of Evan performing the Van Halen cover set as part of UCL’s Rhapsody 2023 performance in January!
So beautiful to read Heather! Thinking of you all and praying, and excited to hear how Evan gets on with his skydive! I love the pictures too :)